Friday, 22 Feb 2019

Sex and Gender Differences

Sex and Gender Differences

“The Little Book of Sex Secrets”

Nicole Bailey

SEX AND GENDER DIFFERENCES

The way we think about gender probably includes some stereotypes which focus on differences rather than similarities. For instance, different behaviours are associated with different gender characteristics. Caring or fussy behaviour may be seen as feminine while aggressive or uncaring behaviour is considered masculine. As a result, some women feel guilty if they behave assertively and some men feel they will be criticised for being too soft. In reality, basic feelings of wanting to be close and cared for apply equally to men and women, but the way we show and manage our feelings may be different.

Sex and Gender Differences - photo 1

Sex and Gender Differences

Sex and Gender Differences. Some stereotypes about gender differences in relation to sex are helpful, but many are not. For instance, a stereotypical view of women is that they are less interested in sex than men, more likely to see sex as indicating commitment, less spontaneous, more difficult to arouse, less likely to initiate sex and less sexually adventurous than men. Equally, a view of men is that they are only interested in sex, averse to commitment but always ready for intercourse. Some of this may be true for some people some of the time, but it sounds like an awful lot of pressure and certainly doesn’t apply to everyone.

Sex and Gender Differences - photo 2

Sex and Gender Differences

SEX AS A RELATIONSHIP BAROMETER. 

SEX AND GENDER DIFFERENCES

Sex and Gender Differences. In women there does, however, seem to be a circular association between overall well being and sexual contentment. It is hardly surprising to learn that these contribute to one another. By no means all, but many men believe that a sexual encounter will cure both general and relationship problems, whereas women are more likely to need their relationship to be okay before they want to behave sexually. Also, men are likely to see sexual frequency as a relationship barometer, indicating how well things are going, while women are more likely to value talking as a sign that the relationship is going well.

Sex and Gender Differences - photo 3

Sex and Gender Differences

Sex and Gender Differences. In other words, men’s idea that intercourse indicates that the relationship is blossoming may motivate them to seek sex more often. Thus, sex is not just reassuring and comforting in itself; the act can be seen as having meaning about you as a couple. It is easy to see how this difference could be construed as a high sex drive in the man when, in fact, the woman’s desire for a sexual experience may actually be equal or greater. His desire may be not so much about a yearning for sex as a need to have evidence of intimacy and confirmation of the strength of the relationship through sex. Both men and women who need this sort of affirmation probably won’t be consciously thinking very much about this or why they want sex – they just do and it feels very important to them.

Sex and Gender Differences - photo 4

Sex and Gender Differences

Sex and Gender Differences. On the surface, then, men may have fewer episodes of felt emotional intimacy but more episodes of ‘sexual desire’ than women do. There are also some theories that men are less prepared to take emotional risks than women and therefore avoid becoming as close as women do. The risk of rejection by their primary partner has even been argued to account for some men’s serial affairs. Though feelings of intimacy do clearly go hand in hand with sexual satisfaction and contentment, all this suggests that reassurance can be a significant reason for seeking sex and may be necessary before intimacy can be properly experienced, regardless of gender. Because this need presents itself in different ways, whether you are in a straight, gay or trans relationship, these differences often translate into the idea that one of the couple is highly sexed and the other is lacking in desire.

Sex and Gender Differences - photo 5

Sex and Gender Differences

 

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